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In honor of the anniversary of my parents on 13 Sivan, I republish the text I wrote last year.
This Shabbat, we are in Israel celebrating the 45th anniversary of my parents. That's quite impressive! So I asked my mother to give me a tip for successful relationships which I will share with you so we can all get, Beezrat Hashem in good health, to such milestones.
The most important, she said, is to realize that a relationship is not 50-50. A good relationship is one where each one gives his or her 100%.
When each one is centered on his or her own wellbeing and calculates how much he or she gave to the relationship and how much the other one should give, it's a recipe for arguments and fights. We are not in the relationship for what we can get out of it. We are not giving our 50% in order to get the other part's 50%. We need to give our 100% without checking and calculating what did I give and what did I receive. And when each one is totally devoted to the wellbeing of the other, then both benefit and the relationship can grow and flourish.
I was thinking that it's the same thing with our relationship with G-d.
We just celebrated the holiday of Shavuot and the giving of the Torah on Mount Sinai. Our sages tell us that our relationship with G-d is compared to a relationship between a husband and wife and the giving of the Torah is like the marriage ceremony.
The best relationship is when we give our 100%. We should not check after each Mitsva that we do what did G-d give us in return but to devote ourselves entirely to our relationship with Him. We should dedicate ourselves to a life of meaning and G-dliness and G-d from His side will look after our needs and bless us with all our necessities,
May we have success and blessings in all our relationships.